Don't get bitter, get better.

I started going to college a week ago, and I fell in love with everything from day one. The faculty is brilliant, I’ve made some of the most amazing friends, and our seniors are incredibly sweet and helpful. During the course of the week, I also discovered how talented everyone around me is. Everyone is not only academically brilliant, but also exceptional at dancing, singing, acting, or debating. And that made me feel really inadequate and useless. I started wondering if I would ever find my place in college, and find something that I’m actually good at. Every individual is a unique combination of personality traits and qualities. The result of comparing ourselves with others leads us to forget our own unique capabilities and we start wanting to be good at the same things others are good at. But what if I don’t have any unique capability? What if I’m an average human being who can do everything but is good at nothing? If you’ve ever had these thoughts, then you my friend are not alone. An identity crisis during various phases of life is only natural. What matters however, is what you do to solve and overcome this crisis.

So I changed my pattern of thought. I looked at YouTube personality Lilly Singh aka IISuperwomanII. She is great at what she does. She has built a community of caring, supportive and passionate individuals. But she wasn’t born with 9 million subscribers. She started her YouTube journey with the objective of making herself happy. And she works very hard every day to achieve her objective.

I realised that nobody is born talented or brilliant. Each individual works on themselves every day. It could be something as simple as reading a newspaper that adds to their knowledge, or putting on music and dancing their heart out.

So instead of getting bitter, I have decided to get better. It sounds easy to do, but if I think about it in a practical sense, then I need to have a proper strategy. What makes me happy? What areas do I want to improve on? Should I try everything, or choose an area of specialisation? These are some of the questions I need to ask myself and find answers to. But most importantly, I need internal motivation. I need to maintain a positive outlook that helps me learn from failures, rather than let them defeat me. You can join me on this journey as I try to find clarity amidst constant confusion. Or you can begin your own journey of self-discovery and progress. But most importantly, remember to enjoy the process!

Simple Ways to Stay Away From Your Phone

"I'm too busy working on being better than I was yesterday."

This quote has been my phone wallpaper for the longest time. I look at it, feel extremely inspired and energised, but then five minutes later I am scrolling through Facebook and killing time.

The world today is full of inspirational quotes and wonderful people. We read these quotes and meet these people. We are determined to change our lives for the better. And yet, comes tomorrow and I am back on WhatsApp, talking about things of the past or future. As fun as it is, I know in my heart that I am spending my precious time on things that do not add to my growth and happiness.

So what do I do? To get out of the endless trap that WhatsApp and Facebook have caught me in.

The first step is realising that I can do it. My life is in my control. Facebook is the same for everyone. Yet the amount of time spent on it is different for everyone. This clearly indicates that the relationship between the Internet and me is determined by my actions.

The second step is realising that we have developed a habit of scrolling through Facebook. More than half the time our minds don't even register the content we are going through. We do it because it's easy. It allows us to escape responsibilities that need to be taken care of.

However, we also know that habits are formed by repeatedly carrying out the same action. Which implies that habits are formed over time and therefore can also be changed over time.

So how do we change this habit?

One possible way is that we restrict the amount of time spent on our mobile phone. I know from experience that this can be highly effective for a short period of time. However, if we want long term success, then we'll have to add another ingredient.

And that ingredient is to find an alternative. Something that you are really passionate about. Remember when you used to spend hours reading? Remember when  day and night were no longer of consequence because The Chamber of Secrets had been opened again and you couldn't wait to find out what happened next? I remember it too. I ache to be able read like that again, To be lost in the magical world of emotions and words.

However, every time I try to read, I am constantly distracted. Why? Because my brain has developed a habit of being distracted by my phone.

Small steps. That is how I will proceed further. Today I will read for just 15 minutes. That's 15 less minutes spent on my phone. Tomorrow, I will read for 30 minutes. That is 30 less minutes spent on my phone.

I am consciously making a decision to change my life for the better. And I know I don't have to do it alone. We can do it together. Small steps only. For every child learns to take small steps before it is ready for the giant leap.